Happy Mother’s Day

Dear Universe,

Today was Mother’s Day. My first as a single mom.

And it was… a day with my kids as a single mom.

They were fucking banshees. I didn’t get a single thing done I had planned. I stuck an iPad in front of their grubby little faces more than a “good mom” probably should.

It sucked. Don’t get me wrong there were good moments between the tears and power battles and “stop pulling your sister’s hairs,” but was it Instagramable Mother’s Day material? Hell no.

Which…. just is what it is, I guess.

Even on days like today, “Mom” is my most important role. My most cherished and rewarding and challenging and impactful.

Sometimes I wonder if I would be in the situation I am today if it hadn’t been. Maybe if I had made “wife” my most important role, I wouldn’t be here celebrating Mother’s Day alone with these little shits who I somehow still love to death.

But we agree that’s not how it’s meant to be, right Universe? I should be able to be mother first AND still have someone who loves me and honors me and sticks around, right?

I know my ex appreciates me as mother to our children. And good God he’d better…

But I look forward to a partner someday who can accept that I am Mom. I look forward to a partner who loves me more for it.

I know my girls will – love me unconditionally for being Mom. They’ll know that I was always here for them. That even on the shittiest of days when I would rather just walk away from it all and start fresh, I stayed. That’s what Mom does.

So Universe, even though it’s freakin hard and it’s maybe cost me a lot along the way, thank you. Thank you for allowing me to mother these little hellions. I know their souls chose me to be their mom for a reason. I hope I have the continued strength to do them justice in this lifetime.

Happy Mother’s Day.

XO – Mom